I'm so Gay.

I'm sitting here watching Glee graduation episode.  Eyes have already watered twice.  I'm so Gay!

And then there is this!!!!!!

The Bible and Homosexuality

This is a very long discussion about the bible and homosexuality.  Let me know what you think.

Am I NUTS

Sometimes I think I'm going nuts.  I sat down at my computer this morning at 8:00 started to work on a proposal for a customer. I didn't open my personal computer, or go to my blog, or read other's blog.  No e-mail, no porn.  I started to get withdrawals.  Anyway that is what I am calling it. I have been on the road, and not at my computer all but one day in the last two weeks, and today I am at home working.

My gut has this knot in it because I want to be on my computer.  So of course, here I am I opened up my computer and wrote a little ditty about it.  Will it stop here? I have work to do here.  I should just bust a nut and get the feeling gone, but instead I will just let it eat at me until I can get a release.  This is the biggest challenge of working from home.

Okay... is this an obsession or an addiction.

Edit:::::  20 minutes later, favorite Porn, favorite free chat line.... Ready to work.

Contact with an old friend

I called an old friend the other day.  Over my "wild gay times" he was one of my best buddies, and friends.  I say both because we started out as buddies.  We had many naked fun times together.  One of the best three ways I have ever had he was involved in.  But later on in our "wild gay times"  he became more of a friend, than a buddy.  He wasn't really interested in hooking up anymore.  We would talk on the phone every day.

The calls would usually be about general life stuff.  Work, kids, marriage.  But we would also talk about who we got naked with, what flakes we talked to etc.... It was a great brother/friend relationship.  After I told my wife I was gay, I had to stop calling him.  It was making it hard to continue my straight married life and talk with him.  I just had to cut it off.

Now we talk about twice a year or so.  I called him last week.  It was so good to hear his voice.  Like a brother that was gone for a long time.  I am kind of sad I waited so long.  He has been going through some hard things.  They may all end up being good things, but they are hard for him.   He changed jobs, and also separated from his wife, and getting a divorce.  He has been married as long as I have, but doesn't have any children.  I think he is still deep in the closet as well.


I feel for him... I wish I would have been there.  I know he has other friends. He has a life, but I feel bad I wasn't there for him.  I may go to lunch with him next week.  I will be in his town doing some work, and if we can both get away at the same time I will.

If my wife knew she would SHIT.  She thinks that me having contact with my gay buddies or friends is just like an alcoholic hanging out with their drinking buddies.  I don't think she gets what gay is.  But that is for another time.