Some Days something is just missing

Some days, I sit in my office, and do nothing, search the internet for something.   A response, someone to acknowledge the true me, something that speaks to me.

Didn't find anything today. My house is quiet, I'm alone for the moment, and I need something.  I don't know where it is, and I don't know what it is. But something is missing.

I did get this in my in box...

But I didn't fight for anyone's rights, I am in the closet in spite of the elder gay's fight for equality.  Nope that's not what I'm looking for.

Look at my favorite escort site, see if I can find someone new... Found a favorite to send an e-mail for an upcoming trip.

Nope.... that doesn't do it...

Looking through my "Reading List" ...

Nope... Not there.  Cock didn't even twing on any of that...

Where is the answer?  I'll go help my wife outside, and that will help, take my mind off of what I'm looking for.  

I'm going to focus on being blessed to have her in my life.

Men's Spas and Adult Bookstores

Someone wanted to know where I go and what phone services I use. I feel I have limited experiences on both, but will tell you what I know.  I do know that if I see a sign on the side of the highway, I tend to get a heart palpation, and have to work really hard to not stop.  I have driven by some and only seen several cars and went by.

Men's Spas and Adult Bookstores.

First, let me just say, you must like group sex and or not be too picky about who sees you naked to go to these.  I have found that most bookstores are a pretty sleazy.  First I don't thing they make much money, or they just prefer not to clean or keep the maintenance up.  Especially if they are in small towns.  I have been to one in South Dakota which was pretty nice as far as arcade type bookstores go, but a lot of them are dark and that makes it very suspect to the cleanliness.  I have found some pretty hot times in them, but you must be able to go with the flow.  Also, make sure if you don't want anyone to know you go, stay away from ones where you may know someone.  I once went to one in the same state I live, and saw someone I knew as I walked in.  I spent the rest of the time, trying to get out without him seeing me anymore.  I'm sure he knows the people working there, and probably checked the cameras and knew it was me.  I have spoke to him since, but he has not said anything about it.

As far as Men's Spas, I have been to the two in Denver, CO several times.  The Denver Swim Club is probably the best for nicer looking guys, but they seem to be a little pickier.  It is a little cleaner too. Mid-town Spa is a little darker, and usually older, and more bear types.  I do find I have about the same amount of fun at either.  The best one I have ever been to is the one in DC.  It is called the Crew Club.  I had a good time there, It is much cleaner then the ones in Denver, but the afternoon I went was pretty slow, although I found some fun.

I have heard about Steamworks in Chicago and it apparently is one of the best in the country, I have never been there, but would love to sometime.  I have a friend who goes, and does not touch any of the guys.  He is really worried about his health, as we all should be. He just enjoys watching and taking in the guys.

Do understand the risks, even blow jobs or kissing can give you something.  HIV is not the only thing out there that can cause you problems.

I will let you know about the particulars about the phone sex services I use next time.

Phone Sex - Imagination at its best

Well since I haven't been traveling much, I have been masturbation more at home.  Sometimes porn just isn't enough, I need something else.  I really think my progression into the gay sex world revolves around phone sex.  

When I was younger and into my early 20s I only played with a few guys.  No actual sex, but played around.  Then later before I was married, I found this cool thing called "Phone Sex".  Of course this cost money, and at first, just like in porn I dabbled in the straight stuff.  It was straight mostly because it was the only thing I could find at the time. It also cost money though so I limited myself.

Later on I found a chat line where it didn't cost money, and I could find a guy to chat with.  We were both calling for pleasure and so neither was a paid performer.  I had a certain guy who gave me his phone number, and let me call whenever I wanted.  Of course that was before caller id, put I used this gay line alot.

Then came marriage, and not much phone sex, because I was having the real thing.  Then after children, that slowed down, and I turned to chat on the internet.  No speaking, but typing in chat rooms.   This turned to more phone sex, but not costing anything.

THEN... I had to have more....  I had to have the real thing, and it was easier to find.   Then comes my slut phase.

Now to today...  I'm back to phone sex.  It is free, and most of the time more enjoyable than porn.  I get to image me and a man naked together, making love, fulfilling our passionate fantasies.  It is one of the greatest things ever.  I image a very beautiful man, and I (still in my 20s) making passionate love. In reality it would be two old men with flaccid penises playing with each other. But for a moment it is real, and beautiful.  I love partaking is some good passionate sex.

The only thing about it while being in a relationship, is that then there is a feeling of relief and guilt that you are not spending that energy on your partner.  I do try to time it so it will work with my real life, but also sometimes it gets in the way of work.


If anyone wants to know which ones I use, let me know and I'll put it in the comments.

If I win the Lottery

If I win, I would want to see this in person.  You think I could make that happen?

My Sexlife by the numbers

Last year I shot my load 113 times.  That is every 3.2 days.   

Not bad for a guy my age... the worst thing is that 88 of those were by myself.  41 one those times by myself were at home.  

I had encounters with about 16 men in 2016.  I say about, because sometimes it was at a spa, and I fooled around with more than one guy, but only counted it as one.  That is more than once a month.

Here is the sad part.  I only did that with my wife 9 times.   Every 40 days... The last quarter has been real bad.  I have been on the road a lot, or sick... She has also had some other issues that have kept us away from sex in the bedroom, or anywhere else for that matter.  

I need to work on that.