Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Letter to my daughter

I'm not ready to send it, but I think I should start thinking about a letter to my daughter about who I am, and why I am where I am.  Then if/when I am forced out of the closet, or want to come out, it is ready, and it doesn't have to be written with so much emotion.  My daughter would not be able to sit and have a conversation with me, so I think I would need to start that way.

She is about 18, and an only Child.

Do you have any suggestions, or good finds in the blog world that would help?

Let me know....
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6 comments:

  1. TwoLivesNovember 28, 2012 at 2:08 PM

    If she's like most young people today, she won't care much about your sexuality. However, what she will be very concerned about is your behavior. Why did you get married? Why did you lie? Have you cheated? Things like that. If you can take the moral high road and your wife backs you up on that, chances are good that your daughter will adjust quickly and easily.

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    1. Not AloneNovember 29, 2012 at 9:33 AM

      Great thoughts. I don't know if my wife will back me on the moral high ground. The one thing I have going for me is my daughter and I go to church together, and she understands forgiveness(unlike my wife.) Uncertainty for sure.

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  2. BlkJackNovember 28, 2012 at 4:13 PM

    I think you're on the right track. Don't know much about this site but was told it was a good resource for someone in your position. Let me know if it's helpful. Best of luck.
    Jack

    www.colage.org

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    1. Not AloneNovember 29, 2012 at 9:34 AM

      Thanks Jack: I always love your thoughts. I will look it over and let you know.

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  3. Buddy BearNovember 28, 2012 at 5:07 PM

    Is there a specific reason that you can't talk your daughter directly? Honesty is the best policy! But there's no need to get into explicit details if she asks if you have a boyfriend.

    There are many online "how-to" articles on this, like this one.

    My kids were perfectly okay with my coming-out which I posted about here as were my parents.

    It was and continues to be a non-issue with them. But Canada is a very different place; their high schools are very pro-LGBTQ and they have openly gay teachers and other LGBTQ folks in their lives.

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    1. Not AloneNovember 29, 2012 at 9:37 AM

      Thanks for the posts Buddy. I will review these for sure. Unfortunately, where my daughter goes to school is very conservative. I think waiting till she is in college, and not enthralled in the details of the problems is the best case scenario. I will see what my wife says.

      My daughter just can not have a conversation. I would have to find the perfect time, and those are few and far between. She gets it from me. I'm preparing, and even a writing it down, will keep me focused.

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