Saturday, September 17, 2011

"I'm doing okay."

What do you say when someone asks you, "How are you doing?"?  I am a, "I'm doing okay."  Type of guy.  Sometimes I get the response, "Just okay?".  I usually tell the person. "Yeah, just okay. Do you want me to lye and tell you I'm doing great, or perfect?"

I don't usually let them know why I'm not doing great, but I do want to ask them why it is so important that I am doing great.  Most people don't have it great all the time do they?

Well where is this leading?  Well my last post was really depressing, and from the comments (Which i appreciated.) I must of sounded real bad.  I guess lets just say I still am "okay".  Not "Feeling like I'm about to kill myself." and not "Best ever." 

Will I go see a therapist?  I probably won't.  For two reasons.  1.  Money.  I know everyone said screw the money go do it.  Insurance will pay for some of it.  But reason 2. says why spend the money?  2. Wife.  I know that she would want to talk about every detail the therapist and I speak.  It is not worth the trouble aftwerwards.

If you haven't figured out.  I like to put my head in the sand, and let the world twirl around me.  That is just me.... that is my whole family...   I should get this statue for our home. 

Still Gay.  Still married. Still doing stupid things that feel right at the moment.  Probably just going to go and have sex with a man.... that will fix it all.  Well for two hours or so it will...

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