Craving Contact

You know......  I have been trying to figure out this feeling.  I have been having it for weeks.  I want to say it is an obsession, but I'm starting to think it is more than that. 

I have been working in my basement alone for the last year.  I only have contact with people by e-mail and sometimes I get someone to talk with me on the phone about the services I sell.  I do get out to make a customer call every now and again, but that has been limited over the last month.  I think I need more people connection. 

Here is what I do, that is wierd.  I have five different e-mail addresses open. 

1. One is my double secret e-mail, I give to people who I don't even want to know my first name.  It is on yahoo and has yahoo chat open.  Very rarely do I talk with anyone there, but I used to all the time when I was trying to hook up.   
2. Another is my secret e-mail, It has gmail chat, and there is one guy I chat with once a week or so. He is a great guy that is divorced and gay.  We knew each other from my hook up days.  
3. One is my personal e-mail with my wife,
4. Two work e-mails. 
5. Then there is Facebook.  I look at it about 4 to 5 times a day.  Reading about everyone else, very seldomly posting anything.
6. Ohhh... and I almost forgot my Linkedin profile.  I don't have it open everyday, but I spend some time on there looking for people I know, and connecting.
7. I also have my reader list on my gmail open all day.  When ever a new blog post is posted, I read it right away.  I continue to add new blogs I like to read.  Sometimes in the morning I can spend up to two hours reading stories or posts on them.  I know, I should be working.  I continue to check them all of this all the time. 
8. I also have to check my stats on blogger.  I love it when I have my viewers.  I am disapointed when there are not enough.
9. Then there is words with friends.  It may fall into another catagory, but I feel connected when I get a message that it is my turn.  Someone just thought of me.

I find that I am then very disapointed that I didn't get an e-mail.  I crave it. (Ohh there is a new Reader Notification. Be right back............................................  Dang it was just my local newspaper posting a new boring story.)  My stomach is feeling it... It is almost the feeling I get when I'm horny.   But that comes from a place a little lower than the stomach. 

So what needs filled?  Is it the connection with men? The connection with family?Am I ADHD? The connection with people in general?  Or is it I need more intamacy in my life?  Am I lonely?

I could just start more cold calling?  

I think I might start working more in the sunlight and upstairs where I can see outside and see the world. I live in a rural area, so I will see nature, not people.  I need to focus this nerveous energy on work.